Catholic Living

From silly devotions and sour-faced saints, Lord, deliver us!
Who I Follow
Jesus left the company of the First and Third Persons of the Trinity, the Blessed Mother, and the entirety of the Heavenly Host… to come to Earth and get stuck in our teeth, slide down our esophagus alongside saliva and mucus, and be digested by our stomach fluids. And if that’s not Love, then I don’t know what is.
Me, while contemplating the Eucharist

Reblog with a cool / funny / happy / inspiring story about your pastor.

catholicliving:

Is it acceptable for me to tell saints “Holla at yo’ girl” instead of “pray for me”? Cuz I’ve been doing that a lot recently. You think they mind?

I think I’m changing my responses to the Litany of Saints at Easter Vigil this year.

"Mary, Mother of God…" "Holla at yo girl"

"St. Joseph…" "Holla at yo girl."

… [much later] …

"All you angels and saints…" "HOLLA AT YO GIRRRRRRRLLLLLL!!!"

Is it acceptable for me to tell saints “Holla at yo’ girl” instead of “pray for me”? Cuz I’ve been doing that a lot recently. You think they mind?

St. Paul, holla at yo girl!

One of my “Catholic” coworkers is planning her wedding… but she’s not going to have it in a Catholic Church. One of my fellow Catholic coworkers is trying to come up with a Top 10 list of reasons why she might want to reconsider. You guys have any ideas of things we could add to the list?

Reblog with your biggest ‘Catholic’ pet peeve.

They should start a Catholic support group: “I was dumped for the convent/seminary.”

Sometimes I forget that Mother Angelica is still alive… Somewhere… Hopefully.

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Who do you think that is on a Catholic’s crucifix? Santa Claus?

Then admits he read the wrong one… then goes back and reads the correct one… so we have to listen to two first readings:

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True story.

  • Jesus: "Even all the hairs on your head have been counted."
  • Me: How many do I have right now?
  • Jesus: 100,000
  • Me: *brushes hair*
  • Me: What about now?
  • Jesus: Now 99,978.
  • Me: *puts hair in a ponytail, takes it out, ties it in a bun, takes that out, braids it*
  • Jesus: 99,375.
  • Me: *takes hair down and rolls down the car windows on a windy day*
  • Jesus: 99,138.
  • Me: *starts plucking at eyebrows*
  • Jesus: YA KNOW WHAT? KEEP TRACK OF YOUR OWN FLIPPITY-FLOPPING HAIRS!!!! JESUS OUT!